Barth Journal Entry #5: Finding the Individual in Barth/What Is a Personal Vocation? (TRIGGER WARNING)

I think I said this at the beginning of the course, but one of the reasons why I wanted to take this class was that I was having trouble finding a foothold (for lack of better terms) in Barth.  It is true that there is very little on the surface that can be applied to disability theology.  Even my part of the Christian vocation is bigger than that.  But in reality, my struggle with the text was deeper than that.  My central problem was I was having trouble understanding the text.  I'm not referring to mere comprehension, (I've been reading college-level textbooks before I could sign my name), it was that he seemed to making an argument that was so intent on being for everyone in the Christian faith that he was losing the individual audience member.  I knew there was no I in team, but I couldn't find any "I"s in Christian, and as far as I knew there were still two.  If our vocation is to be Christian, and being Christian is about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, where is our personal relationship?  And where is our personal vocation?  As Paul writes to the Corinthians, our vocation is to be part of the body, but were not all the same body part, and each body part does something to build the Kingdom.  At some point he has to address this, at some point I have to be in here, right?


Finally, I found a section of Barth which I think addresses a good part of my concerns, on CD IV.3.2 649:

Let us begin with the simplest and most obvious fact that from the formal standpoint the vocation of man takes place in such a way that for the called it necessarily carries with it a supremely personal endowment and equipment.  The Word of God goes forth indeed to all men, for Jesus Christ who speaks it is the Head of all men, and what He declares, the gracious act of God accomplished in Him, has taken place for all men, or the whole world.  In the event of the vocation of His witnesses, however, it comes to these men in such a way that enjoy a special liberation, namely, that it is given to them to receive it, its content disclosing itself to them and they themselves being open to its content.  It does not remain concealed from them.  They hear, see and recognise it, and to that extent each in his own manner and measure shares and appropriates it.  The gracious act of God for the whole world and for all men, reconciliation, the covenant, the justification and sanctification of man, the promise of eternal life, all that has been accomplished in Jesus Christ and is now presented and disclosed to them, is no longer an unknown or improperly understood magnitude, nor is it merely an external and therefore alien phenomenon; it is something known and properly understood, a part of their own experience, i.e., an element of their own life.  This can perhaps mean many different things.  They may have more clear or obscure perception.  They make take it more or less seriously to heart.  They may handle it with more or less loyalty.  They may allow it to speak to and work in them with greater or less willingness and with greater or lesser power and consistency.  But as those who are called by the Word of God, so that they have some measure of knowledge and experience in respect of its content, they are no longer the men they were.  The reality disclosed and imparted to them in the Word of God has become a factor in their own personal existence.

I believe that what Barth is trying to say is exactly what I try to explain to people who are confused about my ministry.  It is true that the gospel is for everyone; it is true that God is calling everyone to be a part of the Kingdom, whether they are currently a part of what is traditionally considered Christianity.  However, Christians are called as a group to a specific purpose.  We are also called individually to our own purposes, in order that we might have a specific impact on the building of the Kingdom.  Christians, because of their partnership with Jesus and God, are able to see clearer the part that they are called to play in the Kingdom.  They understand, however dimly, Christ's goals on Earth and are called to to participate in them.  In the course of understanding and comprehending the goals, the building of the Kingdom is incorporated into their own lives, so much so that they cannot live without accomplishing these goals on some level, whether they are directly conscious of it or not.


People outside the church keep asking me:

What do disability advocacy and Christian ministry have to do with each other, and why would you want to teach adults?  Haven't they had enough school?  Don't you know you can't teach an old dog new tricks; adults will never learn, and certainly not the church?  Don't you know the only way to solve anything is through a youth led political movement?   Don't you know God is just a concept we made up so that the powers that be could exert power over others?  He can't actually do anything except grant 'them' un-earned legitimacy!

Or my personal favorite,

Why are you even bothering to deal with the church? I left long ago when they tried to heal/exorcise me!

Don't think the church is immune to these questions either:

We know you're smart, but can't you stick to the academic sphere?  Or better yet, the Capitol?  We included you as a child, and tried as a youth, so why do you want to work for us?  We agree that you're doing good work, and that it is a calling, but can you please not talk about it in church?  We agree that you're called, but we can't ordain you, because an archaic rule says we can't ordain based on your physical constraints.  You are okay with that, right?  You do know that eventually you are going to need to be institutionalized, regardless of how far you get? 

 My usual response I hope is consistent with what Barth would say/is saying in this passage.  You don't turn off being a Christian when you leave the church building, and you can't turn off having a disability or being an advocate when you come to the altar.  These two identities are not mutually exclusive.  And in my life they never have been.  Yeah, politics and religion have done some pretty crazy stuff to each other.  Especially lately.  Yes, I'll admit the church has done some pretty creepy things to people with disabilities from time to time,(Exorcism, identifying disability with demon possession and/or paying for past sins; sin=disease or disease=sin,drive-by healings, 'pray till it goes away'/'pay till it goes away', forced baptisms, intentional inaccessibility, denial of community, denial of membership, giving legitimacy to institutionalization, etc.) but then again so has the government (Institutionalization, forced sterilization, suggested/forced abortion, systematic poverty, systematic ignorance/non-education, disproportionate unemployment, disincentives for employment, disincentives for self-improvement, disincentives for Independent living, and disincentives for family involvement, disproportionate/inadequate healthcare, disproportionate wages, non-consumer directed services, lack of community services, lack of safety, etc.).  Ignoring whatever side we decide to hate this time isn't going to solve any problems, or strengthen anything, or further any agenda.


I'm living proof that they can coexist.  I'm a lifelong church member, and yet I've always had a disability.  I live, advocate, and worship in the capital city.  I am probably the only person in the world that uses "Stand Up, Stand Up for Jesus" as motivation for physical therapy.  I was an acolyte, (and contrary to popular assumption) I didn't burn the church down.  I went to a Methodist college, when I was a member of a social justice theater group, the allies club, and a Christian sorority, etc.  I even managed to major in comparative religions, politics, English, and minor in feminist studies, while staying sane, relatively balanced, and hold on to my views and values.  If I can be an individual while contributing to the Kingdom, why can't others do so visibly?  If I can hold values, and still be in the middle of the road, and cross the aisle, why is it not obvious that others can do so?